With a new year comes a time of reflection of events from the past year. I cannot say we had a good year by any means, but we are all healthy and still here on earth, well most of us.
2022 has been a year of many trials and struggles for our family. Many of the trials actually happened in 2021 but carried over into 2022. Everything is such a blur from the past 2 years.
In early 2021 my Nana fell and broke her foot. She had to go into the hospital and ultimately contracted Covid. She recovered from it but it left her with congestive heart failure. She walked into the arms of Jesus on February 21, 2021.
I will not go into detail about this particular event because it is not mine to share. This event left our family struggling for months to come. We learned how to show a lot of grace while facing this event. Honestly, it really opened our eyes to life in a small town. A town that my husband and I have lived most of our lives. A town I gave many hours to serving as a first responder. When we needed the people in the town the most is when they turned their backs on us. This was so heartbreaking! We felt so alone while trying to pick up the pieces. But it really made us lean on God with everything we had in us. I realized that I had turned my back on God like the people we thought were our friends did to us. God gave HIS Son for me! I had to release everything to Him. Complete surrender is what I had to do. Trusting in God's strength instead of my own was the only way I could find complete rest. In return I had to show Grace to those that made a choice to hurt us.
Look at this photo still brings me to my knees. My heart breaks into a million pieces over and over again. But it is a constant reminder of God's Grace and protection over my family.
In mid February 2022, while we were still picking up the pieces of the above event, we had our upstairs bathroom flood causing thousands of dollars in damage to our home. The water not only ruined the upstairs bathroom, and hallway, it flooded our dining room. It completely had to be redone.
I was completely broken and wore out by this time. I felt as if I could no longer go on. At this time also my middle daughter was experiencing a lot of emotional stress related to many things happening in our lives. I felt as if I was spiraling out of control. I do not like being out of control. I did not know how to pick up the pieces and make our lives better again. Perhaps this is what God was trying to show me with all of these events. I do not and should not be the one in control, HE is!
Between fighting the insurance company, making sure we found the right contractor and finding the money we needed to make the repairs to our home, it took over 6 months to be completed. If you have ever had to fight your insurance company you know the pain we feel. They are more than happy to take your money but do not want to part with it when you need it!!
Our dining room is so much more beautiful than I could ever imagine it could be. Our contractor did the work in about 2 weeks once we got the money from the insurance company and all of the water restoration companies were done.
I cannot say the past couple of years were all bad. Our eldest daughter was married to the love of her life. They have been doing pretty good. I remember all too well those first couple of years trying to navigate being married and becoming one when things arise. They are doing fantastic! I am so proud of them for coming together and conquering the issues as they come up.
My middle daughter has been experiencing a great deal of emotional anxiety from all of our trials the past few years. She does not know how to express her feelings and most of the time withdraws from life. I am so thankful the Lord led us to a new team of doctors. They have assisted us in finding answers to why our daughters have struggled so much.
One of the diagnoses I have been trying to get for my daughter since she was a young child! Why is everything a struggle!?
On January 7, 2022 one of my best friends in the world passed away after a struggle with Covid. She was so much more than a friend, she was a sister to me. She was the first person I told when I was pregnant with my oldest daughter, she was the first one I told about the abuse I had gone through, we worked together, laughed together and cried together. I know without a doubt she is celebrating with Jesus, but boy did that hurt to say goodbye to her. I know I will see her again but ugh! I miss her so much.
In October 2022 I started a Bible study program called The Healing Journey I strongly urge anyone to reach out and find a local one being offered. This program has really started me on a path of emotional and physical healing of past traumatic events in my life. Both as a child and as an adult. God is using my hurt to heal others!
Well, this post has to come to an end. Happy New Year! I am planning on posting a lot more this year. I plan on bringing more peace, quit and calm to my life. This mean less TV, social media and drama in my life. Thank you if you have read this far!
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